"YOUR WEEKLY TOP TEN"...Created By Lena "The Art Diva" ( The Post-Halloween Edition)

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"The Top Ten Celebrity Masks That Were Too Scary For Even Halloween” Written & illustrated By Lena Hopkins-Jackson

10. “The O.J. Simpson mask” ..... Imagine you’re passing out the Hershey’s Kisses and Skittles when who should pop up at your front door?...The Juice! If he asks for candy apples and jelly beans It’s just a costume, relax... BUT if the conversation turns to anything about the whereabouts of stolen golf clubs, Heisman trophies or White-b@tches-who don’t-appreciate-nuthin’-you-do….then you better run Forrest run like a Buffalo Bill running back, that’s O.J.!

9. “The Joan Rivers mask”...… Older than the Mummy and almost as scary, I can’t imagine anything more frightening than a Joan Rivers look-alike withering away at my door. If she asks for chocolate bars and lollipops, it’s all good but if she starts demanding botox shots and screaming for her daughter Melissa to slide her dentures back in, slam the door and call the "National Enquirer" QUICK!
( ..and um, to be on the safe side…Medic Alert!)

8. “The Wendy Williams mask” … Listening to the “Queen Of All Media” on the radio is one thing, watching her on TV is another…( alarming at first, but it gets easier with time) BUT seeing her turn up on your front porch saying “How YOU Doin’?” ;looking like a cross between Ru Paul and Janice the guitar player from the Muppet show could be downright spooky! Now I ain’t sayin’ Wendy is a man but I heard she was a stunt double for the Wayans brothers in the movie “White Chicks”, but they dropped for being too masculine, ( insert snare drum here: buh-dum-dum-ttttttttt!)

7. “The Suge Knight mask”… Um, need I say more?

6. “The Amy Winehouse mask”…I don’t care how many music awards this broad has, Amy Winehouse’s Crystal-Meth face is not one I want to ever see up close and personal, mask or the real thing. Ain’t nuthin’ freakier than a crackhead-wino chick showing up on your doorstep… AND I’m convinced she hides her stash in that nasty, bee-hive hairstyle…anybody showing up at your house even dressed like her ought-ta’ be frisked for contraband.

5. “The Bill O’Reilly mask”…. Now-a-days it doesn’t get much scarier than Fox news; especially watching the liver spots and jowly rolls of chin fat under Bill O’Reilly’s face. Although I can’t imagine anyone wanting to wear a Bill O’Reilly face mask, the only thing more ghoulish than his face is his bloated, overrated politics…hmmm, or maybe worse, Rush Limbaugh!

4. “The Octo-Mom mask”….. Outside of the obvious fact that she’s crazy like that glue, seeing the Octo-Mom’s face show up at your door isn’t really all that scary…it’s seeing ALL 14 of her kids showing up wanting candy! That’s more than enough to make me not answer the door!

3. “The Joe Jackson mask”…..Honestly who’s more of a scary, ruthless blood sucker than Michael Jackson’s dad? I sure wouldn’t want to see him or anyone looking like him at my crib and If you see him messing with his belt buckle…slam the door and run NOW! We’ve all seen the beginning of “The Jacksons: An American Dream”, it explained a lot!

2. “The Sarah Palin Mask” …Just when you thought it was safe to watch ice-hockey again….. imagine Sarah Palin; now that she’s free of her Governor of Alaska duties actually skatin’ up to your doorstep.... AND with “Palin For President In 2012” shirts too! ( an idea even colder than the state she used to rep, brrrrrrrrrr)

..And the number one celebrity mask too scary for even Halloween is..( drum roll please)….

“The John McCain Mask”… and you thought the crypt-keeper was dead after HBO canceled his show, naw, he just went into politics! John McCain will never stop: a bunch of stinkin’ Vietcong couldn’t do it, a broke-down leg couldn’t do it, and since the American public had the audacity to vote “That One” into office to be president, I hear he’s been plotting his revenge ever since...( even Republicans are scared!) Treat him or any look-a-like as you would any other Zombie and bolt the door!
He told us after his first run for office he’d be back…BELIEVE HIM!

YOUR WEEKLY TOP TEN QUESTION: Do YOU think Halloween is a pagan evil celebration or harmless fun that you still get a kick out of, just like the kids? Holla'....

 

I Voted for the Black Guy

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The day after the Municipal Elections I just so happened to need a fresh cut so I made my way to the Barbershop. I anticipated lively interchange on the typical shop talk, on Twitter I give it the hash-tag #barbershopphilosphy. This has reached the top trending spot several times. Politics, Religion, Sports and Sex (not necessarily in that order)

On Religion

The topic centered on churches in the community who are here to serve themselves and those who are here to serve the lord. The conversation also focused on serving the homeless vs creating opportunity for the homeless. ☚ But the title of this post is "I voted for the black guy" … let's move on.

On Sex

There was a guy selling Viagra pills for $25 bucks a pop ☚ No pun Intended.

On Sports

Yankees in seven. Kobe vs Lebron. The Bobcats & The Panthers. ☚This one's for North Carolina! ♬ C'mon and raise up ♬ Take your shirt off, twist it 'round yo head ♬ Spin it like a helicopter ♬ North Carolina go on and raise up!

On Politics

Okay, here is where the conversation got heated. It started with a simple question of "Did you vote?" Who knew three words could spark such a heated debate. For those of you not knowing the local mayoral race saw an African-American, Negro, Black Man (Anthony Foxx) run against a Caucasian, White Man (John Lassiter) The Governor's seat was open due to the decision by Mayor Pat McCrory, a Republican, not to seek re-election. Anthony Foxx, a member of the City Council, won the election by a slim margin, becoming the first Democrat elected to lead the city since Harvey Gantt was re-elected in 1985.

Issues with the Black Community:

The debate was not really about race but it was? Huh?? "I voted for Foxx because he was student council President at West Meck." "I voted because he is a democrat." "I would have voted for him because he's black." These statement were not polled by me nor or these any of my answers. I was just an innocent observer. The one Black Republican questioned them … What was Anthony's platform? What are the issues that concern you?

Issues with the White Community:

The debate was not really about race but it was? Huh?? "Ok-now the Dems ☚ Translation(Blacks)have complete control…No one to blame but themselves from this point on." "Charlotte just screwed up and at a time when the city is going down the tubes."

I can't answer for anyone else and what is important for me may not be as important for anyone else. (But it should cause' I'm right 99.9% of the time) I voted for the black guy not because of race but because of the issues that were important to me. I have no doubt that John Lassiter was capable of running this city, the two were dead even on issues they just had different views on how to achieve them.

 

 

A Thought / Feeling Split

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Have you really tried to understand?

No. Okay well why don't you try to mute dissent and turn arguments into conversations. ☚ Not a question ... this is advice.

Look outside your own world

We all get caught up secretly believing that our way is better than others, however,The Merciless God of Perfection doesn't want you to believe there are other ways of viewing things. ☚ Shout out to The One real GOD, his SON & their homeboy the HOLY GHOST cause' they are the only ones you should put your faith in.

Pay attention to the needs of others

Try to keep track of what's going on, be sensitive to telltale signs & don't take things for granted. Think constructively & work to improve relations.

Calm your nerves and center yourself

Don't stick stubbornly to your point of view, go ☠smoke or exercise or do that thing the we all like to do ☚ You scream, I scream, we all scream for ...

☠

  • SURGEON GENERAL'S WARNING: Smoking Causes Lung Cancer, Heart Disease, Emphysema, And May Complicate Pregnancy.
  • SURGEON GENERAL'S WARNING: Quitting Smoking Now Greatly Reduces Serious Risks to Your Health.
  • SURGEON GENERAL'S WARNING: Smoking By Pregnant Women May Result in Fetal Injury, Premature Birth, And Low Birth Weight.
  • SURGEON GENERAL'S WARNING: Cigarette Smoke Contains Carbon Monoxide.

An Imaginative World

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It's sleepy, sleepy time ... thought I'd hip you to some late night hipnipedness.

10-20-2009 1-59-09 AM.avi Watch on Posterous

 

Stay on your side of the bed.
Let others make their own decisions.
Be the best you are capable of being.
Dreams can become realities.

A Fall from Grace

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It always amazes me how folk  hide behind a facade of religion and faith, write one social comment praising God and the very next one raising hell. Before you judge anyone for what you perceive to be "A fall from Grace" ... turn the mirror around and ask yourself; Have I cultivated acceptance and understanding? Have I suspended judgments? Have I learned to compromise?

Posted via email from extroversionbelied's posterous

Things That Go Bump in the Night

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Can't sleep at night? Up at 3:30 a.m. blogging? Well me too. I'm up because of my inner demons.

We all know the feeling of struggling with our demons & sometimes it can feel like a losing battle. One problem is that people don't get enough understanding or clarity about what their demons consist of. It's hard to beat something when you can't clearly see. Inner demons are emotional conflicts.

I'm up cause' I've enslaved myself to my ideas for making life better for me and my folk. I'm in my own personal recession and it's this emotional conflict of having the exepctation that others will see me as a disapointment & add the fact that I worked until 1:00 a.m.

A person who is rich in many ways can still feel deeply deprived and dissatisfied. I'm seeing clearly the inner conflict, and beginning to undermine the power of the negative side of said conflict.

*A weakness for money does not imply power*

 

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"THE TOP TEN CASES OF MEN WHO CAN'T KEEP IT IN THEIR PANTS"

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Written & Drawn By Lena Hopkins-Jackson

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10. SWIZZ BEATZ …Okay we all know Alicia Keys is a gorgeous,11 time-Grammy award wining artist BUT imagine how mega producer Swizz Beatz's soon-to-be ex wife Mashonda felt when Lil’ Miss “Teenage Love Affair” kept on falling in and out of Love with HER husband!!! I even read that the heart-broken Mrs. Beatz has been calling Alicia out on 'Twitter', (Oooh! Can 'Facebook' be next?) Well, let's just hope he used some "Ruff Rider”condoms, no tellin’ what else Alicia’s been fallin’ in and out of before Swizz.... After all, talent ain't synonymous with clean, and AIDS is very real.

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9. SENATOR JOHN EDWARDS….Edwards is worse than arm-pit sweat considering HE is the one that cheated on his loyal,cancer-ridden wife , ended up with a love child to boot and if nominated would have slid his slimy,scandalous butt right into the democratic spot( ensuring that McCain would've been president!!) That alone earns him a public beat-down and I’m praying for Elizabeth Edwards’ speedy recovery so she can be the one to do it!

8. GOVERNOR MARK SANFORD.....WOW, the Argentinean women in Buenos-Aires must have Aztec gold between their legs, why else would South Carolina Governor Mark Sanford risk everything ( including a shot at the White house!) just for some chocha! Apparently muy caliente’ chocha at that since this jerk even forgot it was 'Father’s Day' it was so good, I wonder if Sanford remembered using taxpayer money to fly to see his mistress, or wanting to impeach President Clinton for HIS affair OR trying to refuse federal funds to help the unemployed? Ladies & gentlemen, this guy needs an enema!

7. BRAD PITT....Now, I like Brad Pitt, I like Angelina Jolie too...but wrong is WRONG! How would YOU feel if your spouse went off to their job, left you for their co-worker, and everybody in the office knew! Well, the whole WORLD knew about this affair and several years later Hollywood is STILL trying to soothe poor, sweet Jennifer Aniston’s ego by offering her movie role after movie role( no matter how much she sucks in them ! ) As for Angelina, she's a man-eater but I gotta’ give props: any chick who can make a man leave his publically-adored & childless wife to go start a 'Rainbow-Coalition-Tribe-From-Around-The- World' with another chick,plus leave Hollywood to go live in (post Katrina) New Orleans-----> needs to bottle that stuff up & sell it on EBayto the highest bidder!

6. BILL CLINTON... What’s to say about"Slick Willie", I eagerly voted for him twice and would have voted for his wife if President Obama had not run, BUT you would think after all those years of whore-doggin’ that Bill could have found a broad that can keep her mouth shut……um, afterward! ;-)

5. LIONEL RICHIE.....Everything was “Easy Like Sunday Morning” for the ex-commodore turned super star until he left his college sweetheart Brenda, for a younger & ( *GASP!*) White woman behind her back! Well, Miz. Richie TRULY wasn’t leaving without a fight; literally! A third-degree black-belt, Brenda Richie went straight Bruce Leroy and “Raaaah-YUKEN-ed!!” both of ‘em...ALL NIGHT LONG! Forget Mike, I wanna’ be like Brenda Richie!!

4. KWAME KILPATRICK.... Then there's the 'Player-Mayor' from Detroit, you would think a big,ole-swole’ Suge Knight lookin' politician like Kwame would know how to handle his bidness without scandal ,but naw! This guy gets caught using of all things: the OFFICE cell-phone to text his mistress!!! (when will folks learn, 'Big Brother' has been watching since "1984"!) With his political & legal career pretty much a wrap, I’m guessing opening a chain of “Big Pimpin’ Men’s Apparel stores is his best bet!

3. DONALD TRUMP.... When you have money like 'The Donald', it would seem that rules that normal people are governed by don’t apply to you....sadly, often they don't. Trump got tired of his first wife Ivanna, so he upgraded to Marla Maples , Trump got tired of her and upgraded to third wife Melania. With all those Trump Billions, it seems he would’ve upgraded to a new barber by now and told the old one “YOU’RE FIRED!” I mean how hard is it to do a decent comb over..... really.

2. GOVERNOR ELIOT SPITZER… $10,000-a-night for ONE hooker???? Puh-leaze,I think you could book the entire female cast of “The Player's Club” for that price, anybody seen Lisa Raye or the chick that played ‘Ronnie' on screen lately?...EXACTLY!

..AND "THE NUMBER 1# CASE OF A MAN WHO CAN'T KEEP IT IN HIS PANTS... (drum roll pleaze!) BOBBY BROWN!!.....C'mon we all saw it happening. I’m sure his peeps warned him to sit his dumb @ss down, be a 'kept man', and enjoy the good life! I bet even “New Edition”tried to SING it to him: “Bobby, be careful of Every-Little-Step-You-Take with those Tenderonies on the side, cuz’ EVERYBODY knows you’re humpin’ around!" But noooooo, Bobby just HAD to be stupid and go sleep on professional jump-off'Superhead's' couch and get video-taped!( I'm sayin'....c'mon dawg'..."Superhead" ???? That broad would write a 'tell-all' about her son feelin’ up on the girlies by his locker if she thought it would sell!) Next thang' you know, Whitney is being consoled by Oprah( ...and once Oprah gets involved...it's over) Last I heard, Bobby’s praying for "VH1 Behind The Music" to call back for part two, ….. keep waitin' pawtnuh! My Two Cent$ Worth........

 

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The Right People

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She said " Ayo B, why dudes keep dropping me? " I said " cause you keep looking for a man to carry you and your sh*t is too heavy" *DROPPED*

Diamonds can be found in the oddest places - With your nose in the air, you may be missing something right at your feet. Keep your pride under control.

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Jay-Z – Hate

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Hate Jay - Z Kanye West (Explicit Album Version) by Jay - Z Listen on Posterous

Produced by Kanye West *Beat is sick*

Jay-Z ft Kanye West- Hate Lyrics

[Jay-Z]
Haters,
Haters,
These n-ggas haters, and I made myself so easy to love,

[Kanye West]
Yeh, yeh
How much they hate it? very!
Kiss girls like Katy Perry,
I am never sprung but I Springer Jerry,
Don’t try this at home,
Results may vary,
King like T.i But in the Chi, Larry,

[Jay-Z]
Hoover, Hova,
Both are American Gangsters,
You choose whose colder,
Rappers get nasty in the booth but im gross so I can’t even stomach myself, ulcer!
More realer cos I’m closer,
Had girlies in girdles wearing more than they supposed ta,
Poser, no sir,
My hustle, so Russell,
I stretch work, Yoga,
You know i got it down dog, Al Roker,
I used to knock pounds off,
It ain’t nothing for me to knock nouns off,
at these MC’s praying for my downfall,
They just haters, I wave at you,
I’m so player,
I’ll never be done, I’m so rare,

[Kanye West]
We killing the game, its not fair,
You muthaf-ckers stay right there,
cos we too high up in the air,
we blasting off just like a laser,
n-gga, pee-une, pee-une, pee-une
gimme back, gimme room room room,
DB9 like vroom vroom vroom,
Young Hov what we doin doin doin?

[Jay-Z]
We ballin b-tches,
Eating ya food leaving dishes,
Why these n-ggas always talking Lear talk Ye?
Why I never see em at the clear port Ye?
Why I always hear they at the Airport?
Why i fly daily like i’m in the Airforce?
Therefore, please stop talking my ears off,
millionnaire talk,
You haters, you mad at me cos y’all paper,
need to get his muthaf-cking weight up,
Hold up,
wait up, I ain’t done,
name one thing that I ain’t done,
it hurts when you say that I aint the one,
You haters,
How do i gain your favor?
i need to know cause i care,
i need you to love me i swear-ah,
Look here-ah, see Ye is running the Chi like Gale Sayers,
Im running New York, i got the Mayor on my pager,
you can’t fade us, you haters,
i need you, stay back, i breathe you,
like air-ah, air-ah, air-ah,
yeah yeah yeah yeah-a
yeah yeah yeah yeah-a
where are my haters, i love all my haters
love all my haters, I love all my haters,
uh uh uh, haters,
hater hater….