Who That is? That's Just My Baby Mama
/"The greatest gift a man can give his kids is to love & respect their mother"
Read More"The greatest gift a man can give his kids is to love & respect their mother"
Read MoreDear Friend
I know that you might be surprise on this mail, but I am telling you the truth. I know that it is against my official duty to release confidential issue like this to an outsider. There is nothing I can do to help you beside this, I am taking this bold step because of my belief as a Christian.
What I want to tell you is about your contract payment with the Federal Government of Nigeria, there are a lot forces working against you right from the last CBN Governor Chief Joseph Sanusi and the current Governor Prof Charles Soludo, they have been frustrating you by demanding upfront payment from you constantly, If I tell you that they are using all these money you sent to them to work against you, you might not believe it. But it is reality.
There is a way I can assist you get your fund without you paying any charges to get your fund, it is risk but one have to take it, I have assisted one woman from Mexico with it, it worked out though her fund was US$10.5m.
What you have to do is to open another bank account any where, if you can open it in another place, it will be nice, but what you have to bear in mind is that you have to retransfer the fund to another account immediately you confirmed it in your account, I know why I want it this way.
If you want me to go ahead, let me know as soon as you get this mail, if I make the transfer on this week, it might be next month that they will find out and by then, you have retransferred the fund into another account.
Get back to me as soon as you get this fax, via email:
,so that I will be in better position to know what to do.
Sincerely yours,
DR.MRS RUTH EZE
KTT Dept CBN.
Tel:234-802-032-9062
As soon as I get my $10.5MM US Dollars ...
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I’m getting the hang of posting from my cell phone via e-mail. The title suggest that I’m texting while driving, however I was safely pulled over at the time of this writing. I mean to have done so would not have been prudent, not at that juncture.
Random Observations About Nothing & Everything
I thought about a conversation I had with a “Princess” at work the other night, she is a very attractive twenty something who has caught the attention of an older gentleman whom she has no interest. Her words: “Man, he’s about your age!” *Ouch* “He sent me a text at 6ix a.m. … I’ma need him to not be thinking about me that early.” I responded with uncontrollable laughter. Maybe you had to be there.
Small Businesses are suffering during these trying economic times. I could choose which dry-cleaner to drop clothes off, now it seems they’ve all but disappeared. The 2wo near my home, the 1ne near my barbershop. Null.
There seems to be a switch in the number of sustainable relationships among some of my non-love relationships: family, work and friends. Maybe during the summer people don’t wanna be attached? Anywho … I’ve notice that the stages after an initial break up never seem to vary from the script: At first there is the realization, actual realization, denial and bitterness before they move on. Right now everyone is holding in the actual realization phase. I can’t wait for what unfolds in the bitterness stage! Somebody might come up missing! {Yep. A.W. & C.C. I’m talking ‘bout ya’ll}
I thought about a meeting the other day and the facilitator was yielding a mighty weapon. Im’a need you to know the difference between ask and axe.
Mr.TramueL’s Law: Anything that begins well will end badly.
{Note: The converse of Mr.TramueL’s law is not true}
Live Well,
This has been a TramueL Truism presentation.
I attended a beautiful wedding on Sunday July 4th, 2010 at Bernard's Landing over looking Smith Mountain Lake. The set up was beautiful; imagine a clear field of rolling, green grass, your eyes stop just where the grass meets the sand and right before the cool inviting water. Rows of white chairs in the foreground each with their own very unique guest. A small alter provided sensible elegance. The temperature stayed around 97 degrees and the skies were clear. Did you read that? I wrote 97 degrees, open field, sun bearing down on us. No Shade.
Figuratively
The wedding was for a couple with whom I attended high-school, I wasn’t invited directly but went as a “plus one” for a friend that needed an arm piece *I clean up real nice* The majority of the guest in attendance were former classmates that I haven’t seen in years. Years. There were folk representing four years up and four years down from my graduating class. It has been my experience over the years that when I run into folk from school they seem to hold onto claiming attitudes and memories of yesteryear “Play Acting” … Sunday was rather proud of itself, it recognized that a smug attitude antagonizes those around you.
No Shade.
The conversations were light-hearted and genuine. Ego’s were dropped, expectations were dropped, everyone was relaxed and allowed things to happen. Great food, great atmosphere, great music, great drink … Great time. Congratulations to the happy couple! and thank you for allowing me to share in the celebration of your love and commitment.
Magic Always,
LOVE is a serious mental disease - Plato
Mr. “I'm okay with being Mental” TramueL
Silly Bandz - Rubber band-like figures that are worn as bracelets, and can be made into shapes like animals. Immensely popular among elementary-aged school children.
I’m Mr.TramueL and I wear Silly Bandz. Admitting is the first step.
So every morning on my way out the door I take great care to grab my cell, watch, bluetooth stereo headset, my pocket armor {A shield my mama gave me and a bookmark with my favorite scripture on it}, any loose change, my books and last but not least my silly bandz.
Folk recognize them and ask what they are or laugh in amusement that a grown man is wearing them, an associate even asked why … “I thought they were for children?” I told her I would get back to her.
The BIG Get Back
Little Mr.TramueL had me drive to four Walgreens, Books-A-Million, and some snoody-ta-doodie {Oh they fancy huh?} toy store in the middle of the night so he wouldn’t be the last in his class to have them. {The things we do for our kids} But he is so handsome, add the fact that he looks like me … I had to please myself. *Pause*
I like to take his silly bandz while he’s asleep
Fathers must understand these critical needs of every child
Father’s Day was another opportunity for me and self-analysis, you see I hadn’t heard from my daughter and both boys were with me. My teenage son didn’t utter one word about Father’s Day but little Mr.TramueL had given me a father’s day painting a few days earlier. He also {without a prompt from his mother} told me Happy Father’s day. Told me he & BIG bro were taking me out for dinner but I would have to pay. 0_O
I’ve always thought of myself as a pretty good father. I provided for their material needs, did all of the for “show” things but must admit that I’ve failed at giving focused attention and fulfilling their emotional needs. Spending enough time that they thought they were the most important people in the world to me. {Which they are} Finding time to focus on my children has been and is one of the greatest challenges of parenting. I wish that I recognized this earlier with respect to my daughter and first son, which probably explains why they only seem to reach out to me when they need something. I remember being that age and wondering why my parents didn’t provide for my material needs, it was because they were taking great care to provide for my spiritual needs.
I wear the silly bandz because little Mr.TramueL gave them to me, he makes me feel like I’m the most important person in the world. His unconditional love, shows me how to love others despite my sins, shortcomings and failures.
Magic Always,
Mr. “Transforming through my opportunities” TramueL
So I’m back in Corporate America and I remember why I had a calm sense of peace about myself two years ago when I received the tap, the talk and the package. “Workforce Reduction”
Business jargon, buzz words, acronyms, phrases, functional and non-functional cosmetic job title’s all kill me. Kill me.
“Bubble Up”
Corporate: Escalate a situation to someone with more authority than you. Dare to be average.
Streetz: From the process of cooking crack. To become wealthy at a rapid rate. The come up.
“Casual Friday”
Corporate: A day to unwind from the grind of “business casual” through the week.
Streetz: A day to unwind from the grind.
“Team Meetings”
Corporate: The BIGgest waste of time. Where things don’t get done.
Streetz: An outing at the club, bar or someone’s house to discuss all things creative. *Wink*
“’Shoot Me’ an email”
Corporate: To create an email outlining the discussion which you didn't have time to discuss.
Streetz: I would advise against saying anything with the words “shoot me”
“The BIG Picture”
Corporate: Understanding of the complete business model from a holistic perspective.
Streetz: Understanding of the complete business model from a hustlers perspective.
“BOSS”
Corporate: Back Office System typically found in financial institutions.
Streetz: A person who is a leader, someone who runs things in his/her city.
“CEO”
Corporate: Chief Executive Officer
Streetz: Anyone with a business card {Vista Print} and an idea or dream.
“
This excerpt is from @CitizenOjo 's *Follow Him on Twitter* experience at the Blogging While Brown conference in the nations capital … he is blazing in the Blogging Firmament with The Desultory Life & Times of a Public Citizen
I’ve never fancied *Did I just write “Fancied” ? … Don’t answer* myself a writer | blogger, I was simply someone with too much time on my hands. Over the past year and few months of being a part of this social media whirl, I’ve learned to manage my own expectations but also realized the power of social media in business and personal life. Power may be too strong a word for most folk so I’ll *Insert* usefulness.
Personally, I’m not trying to push an agenda or save the world but allow the voices in my head to speak *I have to translate because they speak Spanish*
Mr. Ojo’s statement above gives me the perfect flow over my imperfect beat.
I’m Mr.TramueL and I tweet.
Not So Random Chick: “Mr.TramueL I’m through! What’s the best way to tell him it’s over?”
*Flashback* To the best way I’ve never been dumped. Okay, check.
Mr.TramueL: “I think you should do it during the day, preferably during lunch, in a crowded place, drive separate cars and give the speech after you eat. {I was mad hungry and wasn’t so lucky, the death grip to my testicles was delivered before the meal!} … so don’t be cruel Bobby Brown, let them enjoy that last meal.
I’m not a real therapist, but I play a representative of advice & counsel in real life. Two separate and unrelated conversations prompted me to write. One up top and …
Not So Random Dude: “Mr.TramueL I met you how long ago?” “You don’t have somebody you seeing?” “You still doing that five year and out isht?” {All rhetorical I assume ‘cause he didn’t allow me to respond}
Mr.TramueL: *Blank Stare. Blink.Blink*
The Detached Observer
Background of Not So Random Chick is that she allowed a man to take up residence literally and figuratively while he struggled with employment, child support and “mother of his child” issues. All the while she is holding down the fort without asking him for nay thing’
Not So Random Dude would go on to say that life is too short for any man to spend without a special someone in their life. The dichotomy between the two situations is need. As much as a woman needs to feel she is loved, a man needs to know he is needed|respected. For a man it can be emasculating when he “feels” that he is not respected or needed. I said feel. {Ya’ll are tuff}
Naturally she called bullisht, but I explained that I wasn’t offering an excuse … I mean she asked me "Why is he showing out?" Mr.TramueL’s Observation: Although she expressed love by taking care of him, supporting him and giving him the bizness, in his mind he feels that she didn’t meet or fulfill the “need” of being needed. He probably went somewhere to play captain save-a-hoe.
Experiential Schooling,
Mr. “I might catch some heat over this” TramueL
To make aware and influence by the thoughts and ideas based on social, economic and cultural background.
Water cooler talk: The Weather, The Weekend, Father’s Day, Beautiful Women, Children, The Lottery …
Them: “Money can’t make you happy”
Me: “I just want the chance to prove that theory wrong.” I’m just playing, unless I win.
The conversation progresses past my need to be witty, I was trying to hide the fact that I haven’t acquired a taste for this person.
Them: “What would you do with all of that money?”
Me: “Educate myself, travel, take care of my family & do God’s work.”
Deep bows, I’m sorry but I wanted to pull them in. The reason I may have not acquired a taste for this person is because of a recent conversation about “safety” “hood terms” “myths” & “stereotypes.”
*1…2…3…Break* I’m fitna’ {ATL shawty!} get in trouble because I’ve been labeled as “aggressive” {not their word but the best way to describe it} by someone I “Four Letter Word Beginning In L and Ending In E” this is someone who’s approval I desperately seek but seem to vex with some of my observations.
*Blue 21, Blue 21, Hut, Hut, Hut* I’m not an activist, but I am aware of my environment and the effect that it has on me, you, us. Today I coin the phrase “Observationalist” – To make aware and influence by the thoughts and ideas based on social, economic and cultural background. Now … Hip somebody else.
Of Safety, Hood Terms, Myths & Stereotypes
In an effort to not be “that guy” the person with whom I haven’t acquired a taste for tried to assimilate and associate with the masses by speaking negatively of & on what folk perceive as poor neighborhoods. Having lived in most of the neighborhoods in question I felt it was only right to be “that guy” and educate. “They either don’t show, don’t know or don’t care about what’s going on in the hood.”
“Those neighborhoods” … yeah they care about property values too. Yeah they care about their community too, yeah they care about empowerment too, yeah they care about opportunities for youth too. *Fast Forward one of their comments was about criminals, criminal activity, to which I sarcastically responded crime effects everyone and no community is immune from it, but I digress … the point in one of my teaching moments was that folk return from jail and are treated unfairly, we take away their right to vote, deny them housing and discriminate against them with regards to employment.
The wrap up: (1) What I would do with the money? Work with the city, county, Sherriff’s department to break the cycle for offenders. Develop youth programs, mentoring programs and scholarships. They gotta eat or they might hit someone over the head. God’s work? (2) Interestingly enough I told the person with whom I haven’t acquired a tatse for that they were criminals, we are all criminals, we have never gotten caught. What if you got caught smoking that ooooo weeee! you serve your time, get released but you couldn’t rent an apartment, you weren't able to vote, and you lost your dream job working the frosty machine at Wendy’s?
Man this is long! I’m freestyling ‘cause I’m at work.
Translation: 8 Weeks of training.
Translation: Google Reader ‘cause they block me from tweet’n and you know how much I love Twitter! Shout out Ms.Nikks! Shout out Buzz Can Tweet!
Oddly enough look what I found a day after the mis-education of someone I haven’t acquired a taste for "I'm a criminal and so are you"
Live Well,
Mr. "That Guy" TramueL
My writing process is generally born from my observations of the world around me, life and all of it’s ironic twist. Often transcribed as my attempt at levity of any given situation. I use wit and sarcasm to fulfill a psychological need (fantasy) because my will is directed inwards, often times I try to find a path for it, a path that will allow me to "get away from it all" at least some of the time. T(!)his is generally why I go way off into left field of the point I want to make in my post sometimes most times, so today I’m going to give it to you up front. The point that is. Bad Boy Baby #TakeThatTakeThat
My observations may appear as sharp, insulting or that I’m making light of a particular situation. When in reality I’m trying to assign meaning to what others might consider "ordinary" events. It is so completely natural for me to accept that there is more to the world than what is before my eyes.
“Team of Me” – The Point
I’m not a do-gooder nor am I a law-breaker. However, I’m not afraid of the "dark side" of human nature and will bend the rules from time to time if needed. I’m an introvert and it is more apparent to me now more than ever. Via forbes.com … Thinking first and talking later (Check), focus on depth (Check), exude calm (Check), prefer writing to talking (Check), embrace solitude (Check). It’s a gift and an “opportunity” for me when it relates to …
Friendship
The Gift: I’m a giver & usually quick to help others, not only with er’day common task such as help with a move, sharing information & taking yo’ mama to the store, but also on a spiritual or psychological level.
The Opportunity: To counsel using God’s word. What I’ve found is that most of my thinking is related to HIM, I just never give HIM credit. Thus …
Spiritual Growth
The Gift: I take particular pleasure in growth and life's lessons. I’m an eternal student, so I am constantly transforming, evolving, and seeking a deeper relationship.
The Opportunity: Although I seek God’s love, sometimes I run from it. God is light, the fear of His Energy Star CFLs rated bulb shining on all of the things that are defaced or concealed in me brings realness to my conscience and how I perceive things. {This is a whole ‘notha post} The point: To have God become closer to me has meant facing up to the things about me I don’t like or want to see.
Love
The Gift: I don’t like to brag, so I won’t.
The Opportunity: Learning to receive. We can define, debate, quote, reminisce and site examples of what a four letter word beginning with L and ending in E is or should be, but if we are not open to receive. Null.
*The Close* I can be emotional to the point of irrationality at one moment, and logical the next. How to blend my head and heart is a constant struggle. Moodiness {It’s complicated … my tendency to over analyze can give the the appearance of emotional detachment} and an extremely subjective nature makes me prone to hypersensitivity, which usually has to do with the fact that I take in so much from my environment. ☚That gives you Mr.TramueL’s Observations. Which takes us back up top & starts the writing process.
Mr. “I took time out to really emote and understand my own thoughts & may end up baffling others” TramueL
Companies spend in excess of millions on their Brand through advertising and marketing. Image right? It’s so very necessary. Take for example professional sports organizations, world class right? (Rhetorical) They have development leagues for players that haven’t reached their full potential. Today I’m coining the phrase Semi-Professional Businesses for companies that haven’t reached their full potential.
Mr.TramueL’s Top Ten Reasons To (RE)Consider your business model.
10. When the Monday morning meeting looks like the line outside Club 935 or {Insert a hot club in yo’ city.} I’m just saying, if I can see your thong it’s wrong.
9. Teeth. You can’t speak to me about how great your benefits package is if the person you have facilitating has been in your employ for 14 years but their mouth looks like they chew coal colored rocks. Health benefits kick in after 30 days, dental must start in year 15.
8. Speak up! I know we are inside but u.s.e. y.o.u.r. w.o.r.d.s. I don’t care for squeaky mousey talking people. You’re a professional now put on your BIG boy & girl drawz and sound off.
7. I understand we all have different experiences, we’ve worked different jobs. If your previous employer was so great why are you here? If I have to hear how you did things there one more time! Null.
6. If your receptionist looks & smells like the smoking man from the X-Files it’s time to reconsider your ”lead from the lobby” strategy.
5. My pants sag because I have nasatall, but I’m constantly adjusting them so I don’t look like I’m on the yard. The corporate thug look is not a good look. {“No as* at all” for ya’ll always needing to have jokes explained}
4. Within every company, there will always be one know it all who think that they know what's going on; this person must be fired. Corollaries: 1. Nobody whom you ask for help will see it. 2. The first person who stops by, whose advice you really don't want to hear, will see it immediately.
3. Not really a reason to (RE)Consider your business model but more of a pet peeve. Reset the microwave! If you stop your food before the pre-set time, hit the clear button so that the next person can enjoy their delectable, tasty treat.
2. Your “Want Ad” should read & tell the truth. Strong communication skills: {Translation} You will write tons of documentation and letters.
1. Train your employees on proper bathroom etiquette. Small talk about the weather & dead air fillers should be reserved for your customers. When I’m at the urinal I just want to make pee-pee, I don’t want to hear that the water is cold or deep.
Live Well,
Mr. "My Pleasure" TramueL
*Clears throat for speech*
I don’t know where to begin so I’m going to share how my “be you (tiful)” mind bought this post into existence. It’s a few weeks old and has been sitting in my drafts folder quivering like a frightened child with the fear of being scolded by a parent. {Where is D to the Y? Where is Dez? Where is DJ?} ☚Insiders
I’m on Tweedeck with columns for Twitter, Facebook, Google Buzz, LinkedIn & FourSquare all in view. The word “friend” was lighting up and jumping off the screen towards me from each. Some praised their friends while others contemplated if someone was ever really their friend. So I stopped and I asked myself, I said: “Self? How do you define a friend?” Myself said: “I’ont know kid, I’ont wanna study war no’ mo’.” I mumbled: “T!his guy.” … I think the force was strong with the Blog circle that week ‘cause it spawned a few post on or pertaining to friends.
C.S. Lewis categorizes a four letter word beginning with L and ending with E into four basic human loves: Affection, Eros, Charity & Friendship, of the four friendship is probably the least valued and most underrated. The reason is that many of us have not experienced a substantial, enduring friendship. I have over six-hundred “friends” on Facebook & three-hundred “Followers” on Twitter. These relationships involve nothing but a tweet and a status update, just a passing connection … another reason friendship is devalued. We say associates and acquaintances from work are friends, from these relationships a friendship may grow but it doesn’t have the trust, loyalty, commitment or intimacy of true friendship. The other night while speaking with a conversance they shared feeling alone, identifying the fact that from within their phone’s contact list there wasn't anyone they could call at 10:00 p.m. on a Saturday night. I’m sure they have “friends” but they weren’t clocked in at that particular moment. Aside from my sisters, a cousin, my parents and the women I’ve dated, I’ve never had a true friendship. I’ll minimize that by saying I’m not holding a casting call for any friends because I’m an introvert. Connecting with others is a process, the flow involves questions, inferences and conversation. The problem that I have is that most friendships start from the value of it’s usefulness, achieving some material end or as folk to kill time with. My standard of folk and my actual expectation keeps my from reaching out. I understand that this is a problem and I’m working through (My therapist says only four more sessions at an extended rate & I should be ready to hold a casting call.)
So after talking & hugging it out with Mr.TramueL our definition of friend would be someone who supports my emotional, physical, intellectual and spiritual development. Someone who doesn’t want me to stay as I am, they want me to grow, they want nothing less than my wholeness & my holiness.
There is so much more that I could say but I won’t, I’ll allow you to speak on what you see as true friendship?
Magic Always,
Mr. "One day, someone will walk into your life and make you see why it never worked out with anyone else" TramueL
What Are They?
Every single piece of information you are exposed to is run through a complex set of filters before you decide what, if anything, to do with it.
This causes you to unconsciously delete, distort and generalize information according to a number of things such as your meta programs (these are the things you are born with that are hardwired such as a tendency to be optimistic or pessimistic) beliefs, values, attitude/mood at the time etc.
You have no choice but to do this because you’d go insane (even if you had the mental capability, which you don’t) trying to judge every single thing on it’s own merit.
A real man is a man who's real. He's not trying to cover up his mistakes or pretend he's better or worse than he is. He wants to discover his created purpose in life and get to the root of what's keeping him from it.
Ask for forgiveness, move on, let go & let God.
Photo Credt: wordboner.com
I had to create this award winning post all over again. I’m sharing with you technology tips however, I couldn’t recover my own post … any who!
This is part II to my my Nobel award winning piece “The terrifying Acceleration of Interpersonal Communications Will Uglify All Hope for Human Psyche” were I provided tools to simplify your life. This time ladies and gentleman I will share add-ons and plug-in to use as you are perusing the world wide web. I use Mozilla Firefox primarily so the following are available. Google Chrome may have extensions for most if not all of these as well, but we ain’t talking ‘bout them, we rolling with Firefox.
Cooliris Inc. has two that I use on the regular:
CoolPreviews: If you have too many links to look through, the CoolPreviews browser extension opens a preview window to any link you mouse over when you point your cursor to an individual search result. A small, translucent blue box appears. Mouse over that and CoolPreviews pops up a floating window with that link's contents.
Cooloris {Pic Lens}: Transform your browser into a lightning fast, cinematic way to discover the Web. This plug-in takes you to an expansive "3D Wall" that lets you browse thousands of images, videos, and more with ease and speed.
Ad Blocker Plus: The name says it all. This kills web ads in your web email client and on all of your social sites, it is seamless I don’t even realize it’s there until I’m on someone else's machine and see all of the ads, images, scripts and flash content.

SkipScreen: Never download music without it. This was created to skip unnecessary pages on sites like Rapidshare, Megaupload, zShare, Mediafire, and more.
This is not the actual logo, but I like it. #DontJudgeMe
Power Twitter: Designed to make the twitter experience more full-bodied. PT interacts directly with the twitter.com website & because it is embedded in the Firefox browser it is able to do some pretty slick things: Inline embedded media from Flickr, YouTube, TwitPic and others, expanded URLs so you can see where links might take you, twitter search and search results right on the page, peek - an avatar mouseover that lets you see recent tweets from that person & even status updates that are happening with your friends on Facebook.
Here come my favorites!
Google Redesigned: A complete redesign of popular Google services, Google Redesigned loads and manages several CSS stylesheets that change the appearance of popular tools. It has since grown to incorporate Google Calendar and Google Reader, and is slowly taking on other services one by one. I use it with …
Integrated Gmail: Allows you to make the Inbox Collapsible and loads your choice of Google Calendar, Reader, Notebook, Groups etc... seamlessly into the gmail interface below the inbox (rather than the sidebar) using a collapsible box. It even supports custom URLs (with navigation buttons) and Google Gadgets. If your are inbox minimalist, you can enable minimalist mode to clean up the inbox even more. Works with Google App Accounts and Gmail Themes.
Here is a snapshot of my Gmail Inbox using both. I've integrated my Google Voice account and my Wordpress Blog.
My absolute Favorite!
Circle Dock: The Circle Dock application was designed to help you launch your programs from a circular dock, drag and drop your files, folders, and shortcuts onto a circular dock that you can resize. Rotate the dock with either your mouse wheel or the keyboard arrow keys. Change the image shown for the icons and change the skins (compatible with icons and skins for Rocket Dock, Object Dock, etc.) The dock appears where your mouse is by pressing a hotkey (default is F1) or your middle mouse button, other options available.
I use it to keep my desktop organized and clutter free. Wanna see it? here it go …
This concludes my portion of the show folks, nothing else to see please move along.
Magic Always,
Mr. “Be You (tiful)” TramueL™
So I’m on my intelligently hedonistic tip commenting on my blog homie Sunny D’s Spoken Words & Thoughts post “Light Skin Complex” … I drop a little knowledge and walk away. My equilibrium was off so I retraced my interactions for the hours, days & week until I returned to find someone had willfully and rather maliciously destroyed balance in the TramueL™verse, I mean, ♬ I know way too many ♬ people than I did last year ♬ who the F is you?
The comments did not effect me in the way I’ve dramatically displayed above. It reads as if someone was out to destroy me … nah kid, I’ont study war no’ mo’. Honestly as I tried to explain the dis-connect between what she read and interpreted to what my response really meant. Other thoughts ignited a fire deep in my loins. Mr.TramueL is a peace enabler and before I continued on the path of least resistance I invited her to step outside, ‘cause I know some body snatchers. Seriously, (I do) but no really to take the debate offline instead of showing out all willie nillie on someone’s page. After a sharp warning that I was pretty slick with this here technology thang‘ & that if she tried to spam me, somebody was about to come up missing, I offered her my email address so we could continue our verbal jab’s offline. She would have to bob and use her weave.
She accepted and responded saying that she laughed at my “spam” comment. Her point (kinda) was that I was neither a dark or light skinned female so I could not offer an opinion as such. I explained that my response was not my view but a way to step outside of the typical thought process that someone was inferior and that there are outside influences at work.
Go read the post and comments. I’ll wait.
I want to preface this next section saying that I informed Gorgeous Puddin (That is the name that came through her email client) that I would be immortalizing her in a post and gave her an opportunity to respond to my take aways. My first observation: The need for her to go soo hard for soo long *pause* I mean the need for so much detail? I did tell her that I would welcome it and appreciate it on my page, however, it was almost a mini post, she could have responded on her own page and linked to it. Mute point. She did answer this for me indirectly though. “I normally don't comment on blogs outside my circle as you say, but race issues provoke me in such way, and because it is my field of study (b.a. Sociology and African American studies currently finishing masters in Education on to PhD.) i have to say something.” Point taken. Which brings me to thought number two. Education & why she felt the need to bring it up soo many times? I said: “The second point to jump out at me was your need to mention your education (Which I am very proud of as a human being that you have achieved so much and continue to thirst for more. *Ovation*) it is almost as if you are compensating for something. I thought it was irrelevant, your words showed your intelligence, besides University degrees don't guarantee intelligence.” … “concerning the subject and nature of the post, again it makes me wonder about why it was such a hot topic for you. Maybe the situation was reversed? Instead of the attacking you were being attacked? Not enough love from the fellas in school? Did they prefer the lighter-skinned women?”
So I didn’t receive a response (yet) from Gorgeous Pudding, the irony maybe that my e-mail is sitting in her spam folder O_O. Tips to avoid BB (Blog Beef) Get the best out of your interactions. Play fair. Try to transcend differences, avoid pettiness & minor irritations.
Mr. “I know you believe you understand what you think I said, but I’m not sure you realize that what you heard is not what I meant” TramueL™
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It’s Me … Mr.TramueL! Seems like forever since I left you without a strong post to step to. Bear with me on this one ‘cause I don’t know the point I’m trying to make. Random thoughts around my ex, un-employment and my future.
Of The Job Interview: Interviewed with Bank of America this week (Third interview in as many days) … a little history, I was a victim of “workforce reduction” two years ago this month. The new position to many would be considered a step backwards but hey I gotta eat, baby mama’s want child-support and kids want gifts.
Of The Ex: My ex-wife through all of our years together {total of 14 maybe, married 7 or 8 of them} who really remembers? Don’t answer & don’t judge me … anywho let’s call her “Chica” ‘cause her dad was Dominican and after I took my last name back she decided to use his (used her mama’s maiden name prior) but I digress. Anywho, Chica tends to remember our wedding day and sends text messages saying “Happy Anniversary” I guess you would have to understand her personality to understand why, sure there is some sarcasm there but secretly she still desires me, I mean who wouldn’t? I’m an incredibly sexy man. J/K ☚*Disclaimer just in case she ever reads this, but we all know the truth. Wink. WInk. Blank Stare.*
You have questions: “Mr.TramueL? What does this have to do with the title of your post.” Well I have answers … The recruiter, the interviewers all made a subtle hint at the variance in salary from my previous position with the bank to the max pay for the position applied, my “read”, they wanted some explanation why I wanted to work in their department. So I gave the corporate “build a foundation” speech. I looked over at one of the women during the interview and she was salivating .. I guess it was what she wanted to hear or it could have been my crisp white shirt with my blue tie & my Austin Reed suit. *Shout out to three buttons, back vents & Euro cut*
It resonated with me, the question of money, it seems for the sake of making a living we forget to live. I thought being a good husband meant working like a rant mule so that we could have “things” … the best things in life aren’t things. Chica seemed to want the best of both worlds, She said: “Go pick up that bail of hay negro & afterwards let’s go on a trip to Africa.” I said: (Nothing) But I thought … never allow your sense of self to become associated with your sense of a job. If your job vanishes, your self doesn’t. The happiest time of my life has been during this period of unemployment, I’ve been able to spend more time with my family immediate and extended, been able to reveal some hidden passions and get serious about my health, my relationship with Capital G’dizzle, His Son & their Homie the Holy Ghost. There are plenty of folk whom have found the acquisition of wealth only a change, not an end of miseries. “Mo Money, Mo Problems”
Don’t cry for me Argentina this isn’t a nostalgia piece about my ex or the past but a segway into my future, this is about lessons learned and carrying them forward.
Of My Future: Relaxed in Love.
He who loves money will not be satisfied with money, nor he who loves abundance with its income. Ecclesiastes 5:10 NASB
Mr. “She remembers our anniversary, I remember our divorcesary” TramueL