What Remains: C. Black

What remains? That is the question that this musing is centered around. Context? None really. Just a blank slate with a question staring at me. There are so many directions one could go with this so let me give it my best shot.

I think that we are all filled with social energy when we are young. Our gauges show full, and we embark into life with our batteries at 100% and we are ready for new experiences and relationships. As we start on our journey, we pour energy into these experiences and relationships with an aplomb that is unmatched. We don’t know what the costs may be, so we give generously and don’t think about the expenditures because we don’t have a concept of total depletion.

As we proceed through our journeys and time passes, we also undergo “system updates” that change our perspectives and how we operated and give of ourselves. We see things differently through each phase of our lives and we allocate our system resources with different objectives in mind. As we age, we realize that some of our resources may be allocated to obsolete objectives, and we shift them to stay efficient and viable in our environments. We may occasionally run into a situation where we try to exceed our current systems operating capacity and we try to revert to a previous configuration because we remember what our previous capabilities were, only to find out that we are unable to access that level.

When we love or have any deep emotion with someone, we expend an exponential amount of energy and leave a part of ourselves with them. We can recharge ourselves after these encounters, but just like a battery that is depleted multiple times, after a number of these deep engagements, we are not able to return our charge to 100%. As we proceed through these encounters and reach our later years, we do not have the capacity for frivolous expenditures of our emotional energy, and we are careful on what we spend it. Our youthful curiosity and exuberance are replaced by skepticism and reservation. We approach new relationships, either platonic or intimate with a sense of hesitation because we understand that the energy expended and the “piece” that we will leave behind will be harder to recharge and replace. Our fast-charging mode is no longer available, and we know that we are getting closer to the time when our battery will deplete and no longer hold a charge.

So we are back at the original question, what remains?  Memories, triumphs, failures, experiences, contentment or combinations of everything? In my humble opinion, what remains is wisdom, and that wisdom determines our energy expenditures.  We are a culmination of all that we have experienced, and our wisdom has come from the sum of those experiences. They shape our current attitudes and our desires. They determine whether we are apprehensive or bold with our remaining energy.

Our past leads our future. Check your level and act accordingly.

— Shared by C. Black