Things I've Decided Are Correct
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Professional Overthinker. Semi-Professional Pizza Enthusiast.
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At some point I started signing my emails that way and nobody said anything, so I kept doing it.
It started as a joke. Or at least that's what I told myself. But jokes have a way of being more honest than the stuff you actually mean to say. Somewhere along the way it stopped being a bit…
Read MoreA Theory Is Better Than Its Explanation
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I’ve been saying this for about fifteen years. Half joke, half insurance policy.
It started in meetings, watching people perform thinking instead of actually doing it. Say something broad, let it hover, nod like it means something, and move on before anyone asks the obvious question. The theory sounds smart. The explanation is where the curiosity begins…
Read MoreYou are the dream, the nightmare, and the dream within the nightmare that becomes a dream
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The recursion is doing real work. It doesn't resolve anywhere. You just keep falling through floors.
"The disappointment you keep experiencing isn't a bug, it's a feature" is so sharp that I cut myself. I've thought it but never said it out loud. The do/don't list at the bottom is perfect too…
Read MoreDrafts Are Enough
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Ten things I'd write about if I had the energy.
Today it's four.
Charlotte traffic has lost its mind.
I don't know what happened or when, but something shifted. It's not rush hour anymore; it's just... hour. The merge on 277 alone has taken years off my life. There's a longer post here about infrastructure and growth and what a city owes its people, but I'm tired, so: it's bad out there. Drive safe…
Read MoreHunger is Information, Not Urgency
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I've been sitting with something.
It shows up at work when someone says let's grab lunch and what they actually mean is I need to think out loud and I need a witness. It shows up in family, where Sunday dinner was never really about the food and everyone knew it but nobody said it. It shows up in friendships that only seem to exist inside restaurants, and in romance where cooking for someone is one of the earliest ways we say something we're not ready to say out loud yet.I've been sitting with something.
It shows up at work when someone says let's grab lunch and what they actually mean is I need to think out loud and I need a witness. It shows up in family, where Sunday dinner was never really about the food and everyone knew it but nobody said it. It shows up in friendships that only seem to exist inside restaurants, and in romance where cooking for someone is one of the earliest ways we say something we're not ready to say out loud yet...
Read MoreRandom Observation #7,842,003,491,226
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People have been peopling lately. I'm not sure if my antennae are just up or if the behavior is genuinely escalating, but either way I've started writing things in my Things I give a fuck about notebook…
Read MoreWhat Held Up
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I didn’t end this year chasing a better version of myself. I ended it learning how to stay.
Stay with the work when it got quiet.
Stay with people who didn’t need me to perform.
Stay with my body long enough to hear what it was asking for.
Stay when leaving would’ve been easier…
Read MoreOn Forming Purpose
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I used to think purpose was something you discovered. Like a hidden room everyone else eventually found, and if you paid enough attention or waited long enough, you’d stumble into it too. I kept waiting for that click. The moment where everything lined up and pointed in one clean direction…
Read MoreRandom Observation #300,298,754
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Year-End Signals
This time of year always pulls at me in two directions. There’s the part of me that’s still figuring out how to walk through December without flinching. Grief doesn’t circle dates on a calendar, but my body somehow remembers anyway. So while everyone else is swapping travel plans and holiday playlists, I’m moving through the days with a small echo in my chest. Present enough to function, not always present enough to feel…
Read MoreWhen Sadness Knocks
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Some days arrive quietly, carrying a heaviness I can’t always name. It doesn’t shout or announce itself it just shows up in my chest, in my pace, in the way the light feels different.
Sadness has a way of disguising itself. Sometimes it’s weariness. Sometimes it’s distraction. Sometimes it’s silence when I usually have words…
Read MoreIn To Me See
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The quiet language of cooking with someone who knows your taste, because it’s their own…
Read MoreLove, In a Genuine Eloquence
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1 Corinthians 13. This chapter captures love with such genuine eloquence that even a non-believer might pause. Drawn in by the beauty of the language alone…
Read MoreHealing, But Still a Virgo
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They said heal. I'm healing.
They said let go. I'm working on it.
But I’m still triple-checking your grammar…
Read MoreThursday Afternoon Sensory Input
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Somewhere between now and not yet.
There’s something about today. The air is warm, but not urgent. The light hits everything just a little softer. I feel it in my chest, not sadness, exactly, but a kind of stretch…
Read MoreJuly Brings the Women
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This gift of extra days stretched wide and warm, full of stillness, movement, and the women who shape my world. The kind of company that asks for nothing but your presence. I started Friday by honoring my commitment to the YMCA, a place that's become more than work since I began there in November, but a community of familiar faces and shared purpose. My 10 AM finish gave me the perfect window for the three-hour journey to Snellville and my waiting family. They’re vegetarians and lovers of good food—we’ve always shared that language. They prepared a beautiful meal, and we broke bread with gratitude and laughter.
Read MoreFew Antipathies: No Argument with the Air
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Lately, I’ve been releasing the need to convince, explain, or defend. Not because I don’t care but because I care differently. With less friction. Less fight. Fewer antipathies. There was a time when every misunderstanding felt like a challenge. A cue to clarify. A reason to prove I’m thoughtful, considerate, grounded, whole.
But now?
Read MoreFew Antipathies
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I’ve whispered it in blog posts before, few antipathies. Not quite a mantra, not quite a goal. More like a quiet way of being. It means I’m choosing not to hate what doesn’t deserve my energy. It means I’m softening, not folding. Breathing, not bracing. This summer, I’m letting that phrase stretch out and take up space. No longer turning summer into a performance review. No more trying to outrun the heat or outwork the joy. This season, I want lighter meals, lighter moods, and lighter reactions. Stillness over strategy. Ease over effort. Presence over proving.
Read MoreIncongruence
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Raising hell on Saturday night, and praising God on Sunday morning…
There is a tension a lot of people feel but rarely articulate: the dissonance between professed belief and lived behavior, especially when it intersects with expectations around gender roles. When someone invokes God or religion to define what a man “should be” “God-fearing,” “the head,” etc. and yet lives in a way that seems contradictory or even performative, it can stir up a mix of emotions: confusion, frustration, maybe even cynicism.
Read MoreThe Rituals of People Watching
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Sometimes, the best view isn’t the sunset or the skyline it’s the quiet theater of people just being themselves.
There’s an art to people watching. It’s not just staring, it’s noticing. The small things. The way someone fidgets with their keys while waiting for coffee, staring at their phones on an elevator with limited reception, or how a couple leans closer when they laugh, like their bodies can’t help but remember they’re each other’s favorite person…
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