The Rituals of People Watching

The Rituals of People Watching

Sometimes, the best view isn’t the sunset or the skyline it’s the quiet theater of people just being themselves.

There’s an art to people watching. It’s not just staring, it’s noticing. The small things. The way someone fidgets with their keys while waiting for coffee, staring at their phones on an elevator with limited reception, or how a couple leans closer when they laugh, like their bodies can’t help but remember they’re each other’s favorite person…

Read More

Sweat as a Spiritual Practice

Sweat as a Spiritual Practice

There’s something that happens when I walk into the gym. Not just physically but emotionally, energetically. No music yet, no reps. Just a stillness. Like I’ve entered a space that demands both effort and honesty. It’s not about punishment, not about ego. It’s about presence.

And when I’m present ( ( F U L L Y ) ) I remember that this, too, is sacred…

Read More

The Quiet Gift of Being Asked About Your Day

The Quiet Gift of Being Asked About Your Day

We hear a lot of questions in passing… How are you?” “What’s up?” “Everything good?”

They roll off the tongue like greetings, not always meant to be answered. Just part of the rhythm of daily conversation, like holding the door or nodding to someone in the hallway.

But “How was your day?”…

Read More

The Check In Text: “You Good?”

The Check In Text: “You Good?”

Sometimes, all it takes is two words.

“You good?”

No frills. No punctuation gymnastics. Just a quick tap on the shoulder of someone’s life, asking if their world is still spinning okay. And more often than not, the reply is just as simple:

“Yeah, I’m good.”

Or maybe, “Not really, but I will be.”

Read More

The Weightlessness of Not Explaining Yourself

The Weightlessness of Not Explaining Yourself

There’s a kind of peace that comes from not having to explain yourself. Not because you’re avoiding anything. Not because you’ve shut down or closed off. But because the people around you already get it. You’ve built a rhythm with them intentionally or over time where your boundaries don’t need a presentation, and your choices don’t need a backstory…

Read More

How We Talk About the Weather When We Mean Something Else

How We Talk About the Weather When We Mean Something Else

Small talk as emotional shorthand.

When we say “Nice out today,” are we actually saying “I’m here, and I need connection”?

But I’m about to get in the shower—is such a small sentence. We say it quickly, almost out of habit especially in texts. Let me get in the shower real quick and I’ll call you after. But have you ever thought about what we’re actually saying when we say it? It’s not just about hygiene. It’s not about the water pressure or the lavender-scented soap. It’s a subtle way of saying:

Read More

A Full Cart, A Quiet Mind

A Full Cart, A Quiet Mind

A random observation about nothing and yet, everything—grocery shopping when you’re finally buying for pleasure instead of survival.

What changes when you’re not scraping by?

It hits me in produce, this small but steady feeling that I’m no longer in survival mode. No more calculating how long I can stretch a box of oatmeal or if I can afford the fruit this week…

Read More

The Unspoken Agreement of the Passenger Seat

The Unspoken Agreement of the Passenger Seat

There’s a quiet choreography that happens when someone gets in your car, especially when it’s someone you care about, or someone you’re still learning.

No words need to be exchanged, and yet, something subtle unfolds. They hop into the passenger seat, and I hand over control of the music, literally. My phone stays put, and theirs gets linked via Bluetooth…

Read More

That First Sip of Water After a Long Walk

That First Sip of Water After a Long Walk

One of my favorite hikes is the seven-mile loop around Salem Lake in Winston-Salem. The trail offers good elevation, but it’s more of a moderate walk; gravel paths, inclines, and beautiful views. Whether I’m on the treadmill at my home gym, running on the outdoor track at the Y, or hiking at Freedom Park, I prefer to work out fasted and only drink water after my session. The same holds true for my hike around Salem Lake. I don’t weigh myself down with a water bottle or a “fanny pack” filled with keys, phones, and other things. I simply power through, focusing on the task, until I reach the finish line…

Read More

Reflections on Cultural Criticism and Authenticity

Reflections on Cultural Criticism and Authenticity

I unmuted Kendrick, Lamar, Drake, NFL, and Super Bowl and now I see why I muted them in the first place.

Many of you are deep in confirmation bias,

the tendency to search for and interpret information in a way that confirms your pre-existing beliefs while dismissing evidence that challenges them

This has become particularly evident in the ongoing discourse around certain artists.

THE EVOLUTION OF A DISCOURSE

& I've found myself increasingly troubled by the intensity of criticism directed at Drake, particularly in the context of this recent "rap battle" with Kendrick Lamar. What started as typical rivalry evolved into something far more complex; a referendum on cultural authenticity, racial identity, and the unspoken rules of belonging.

Read More

The Professor

The Professor

If the third-grade teacher in the Honda Accord is the foundation, then the professor is the evolution. Someone who takes what is simple and gives it depth, who refines knowledge into wisdom. She is the kind of person who doesn’t just read the world but interprets it, who knows that the right question is often more valuable than the right answer…

Read More

Listen With Your Ears And Not Your Mouf'

Listen With Your Ears And Not Your Mouf'

My son, not-so-little Brian, is a sophomore in school and has shared concerns about the current state of affairs in these un-United States. He worries about how current policies will affect his ability to find meaningful work. I initially minimized his concerns by advising him to keep his head down and finish school. He will always have a place "at home," and he won't have the burden of student loan debt because The Tramuel (formerly known as) and I have covered his tuition. But his concerns are still valid, and it's important to listen and empathize…

Read More

Random Observations About Nothing #10,568,943

Random Observations About Nothing #10,568,943

Life has a way of delivering its insights through the most random moments... a quick glance, a passing comment, or even the way someone approaches you at work. Lately, I've been reflecting on a few of these types of observations, and I can't help but notice how they overlap with larger themes about connection, perception, and grace…

Read More

The Weight of Staying Connected

The Weight of Staying Connected

I’ve often told myself that “you are not responsible for someone else’s feelings, only for how you advise them of your disinterest.” It’s a principle rooted in fairness and boundaries—a way to navigate relationships without leading anyone on or offering false promises. And in theory, it’s a reasonable and honest approach. But in practice, it feels much messier…

Read More